The joys of being not neurotypical.

I knew all my life that I wasn’t “typical”. But unfortunately, it took me up until the age of 24 to start accepting it.

Growing up, I constantly compared myself to girls my age who had boyfriends, cared about make up and fashion, and was able to remember things without writing them down. Don’t get me wrong. I compared myself against everyone who got a certain mold as a kid, and it got even worse as an adult, but this resulted in me seeing something constantly wrong with my differences instead of embracing them. Since I have no excuse now, as I am an adult, it took me a long time to begin to stop feeling sorry for myself for being “different” when all I wanted to do was settle on being plain ol’ “normal”. Thanks to my aunt and uncle who are like second parents to me, I learned that life is better when you take what you’re given and do the best with it. I may not have been given a thin body or long, thick hair. But I have been given a body and hair, so it’s best that I get to know it—get to know me—for the rest of my life, in good ways.

So I wanted to reflect on three things that I like about being non-neurotypical.

i connect to things easily.

When I get into something, it’s really hard for me to stop. It could be the most boring thing to someone else, like sweeping or mopping. But if my whole mind is in it, it’s tunnel vision, baby! There’s times where I have been writing or reading something and have forgotten to eat, sleep (this is common) or I’d just wake up and my things are neatly placed on the side of my bed. (It’s me that puts them there somehow.) When I drive, as I’ve learned, I can’t multitask. My eyes have to be glued to what’s in front of me; I can’t even fiddle with the radio. (I almost did this yesterday and told myself to wait until a red light.) Actually, I can’t multitask at all. In anything. Ever.

Because I’ll get too sucked into whatever I’m doing that I’ll forget about the other thing.
I like this about myself, because it means that when I need to devote my full attention to something, I can, and I will give 100%. My aunt has seen this and pointed this out to me, and so has my uncle. Right now, I am currently working on an article that I was dreading to start since I had never written about this topic before. (I like writing about entertainment/lifestyle and I’m writing about real estate.) But as I started outlining and choosing quotes, I got so into the story and the person I interviewed that I almost was late to clock back into work and ended up spending another hour on it while the children were napping!

Actually, at the time of writing this, I am on my way home on the bus. In the back of my mind, I am getting butterflies thinking about how I will most likely stay up all night to finish this story so I can send it off to my boss. It excites me, and I’m looking forward to it. But all it took for me was to get the ball rolling. Now I um…don’t really know how to stop it. (Update: I finished the article Friday morning, August 13th! I didn’t end up staying up to finish it because I was so tired. But I did end up finishing it that Thursday night!)

i am always keeping myself on my toes.

This especially surprises me when it comes to my sense of humor. I really enjoy dad jokes, riddles, and telling stories. I like playing with dolls with my cousin (she is 10) and I never stopped doing this since I was a child. I just love the drama, suspense, and the way you can make the dolls come alive with the touch of your fingers. This is why I enjoy writing so much, because I can literally create my own world in my head, and write about it if I’d want to later! I enjoy bright colors, making things, and abstract art. I recently realized that I like naming things and giving them nicknames. All of my children at work have specific nicknames from me. My car, which I haven’t even had for two weeks, has a nickname now.

I am very quiet but can be animated when I see something I think is very cute. Just recently, I also learned that I do in fact have self control after so many years of saying I didn’t. (Yay!) I also really like to stare at people and things. My mind races when I see certain patterns. Yes, I do tend to stare when I see a really handsome guy or a very pretty woman. I am learning how to minimize the staring. I make myself laugh at how much I stare at things and my mind just races. I crack myself up a lot.

i have to plan EVERYTHING

My aunt knew this about me way before I realized I was a planner. I always thought I was one of those people who could “wing it”, but boy was I utterly wrong. Not only is “winging it” not recommended for me, but I need tons of planning time for even “small” tasks. (I put quotes because they may seem small to others but they’re not to me.) For example, I have a calendar where I write everything out that I’m going to be doing that day. I used to have a planner that I physically wrote in and decorated with stickers and colors. I need this physical thing to help me get into the mood to writing down things I needed to do. My aunt tells me when things will be going on moments in advance. She’ll tell me months before a vacation what I need to do and to make sure I have things ready. In the past I stupidly used to ignore her words because I felt ashamed that I couldn’t just “remember” things. But now, I am grateful that she gives me so much time to prepare and considers me that way. I learned that the best me is a woman that has taken time to prepare and plan as much as she could.

Now, I am aware that not everything can be planned. I, like everyone else, has to learn how to go with things. (Well…when it comes to life that is. For anything else, I don’t care. I don’t even care about food. As long as I like it, I’m eating it.) But I am excited that at least I can control some aspect of my life, and I can know that I can make the stickers and color blocks in my planner pink if I want to. ☺️

bonus: my life is very bright!

I have so much fun in my life. I enjoy getting into a new TV show and talking about it to everyone and anyone. I am never boring and I see so much color in everything. I am starting to believe that I truly do bring color to everything I do.

Yes, I was born not normal, but I don’t think I need to be. I am unique, cool and weird in my own way and I’m starting to like it! And I’m still digging the color pink. (I don’t think that’s going to end any time soon.)

Here’s the article I was writing!